Happiness — it's what we all strive to find and keep, even when it's as elusive as ever. Nobody is happy
all the time, but some people are definitely more fulfilled than
others. Studies reveal that happiness has little to do with material
goods or high achievement; it boils down to your outlook on life, the
quality of your relationships, and basic amenities like good governance
and community resources. Read on for more tips and tricks on how to
unlock the happier you.
Steps
1- Be optimistic.
In the 70s, researchers followed people who'd won the lottery and found
that a year afterward, they were no happier than people who didn't.
This hedonic adaptation
suggests that we each have a baseline level of happiness. No matter
what happens, good or bad, the effect on our happiness is temporary, and
we tend to revert to our baseline level. Some people have a higher
baseline happiness level than others, and that is due in part to
genetics, but it's also largely influenced by how you think.
- Add up all the little happy things that happen to you during the day. For example, there was no traffic on the road, you had a nice breakfast, your friend said something funny that made you laugh, you took your dog for a walk in the park and played with it. All of these added together account to one big happiness.
- Look at the glass half-full instead of half-empty. Your girlfriend break up with you? Now you have a chance to meet someone else! You lose your job? Now you have the opportunity to find a better one! Adjust your mentality so that, in everything that happens to you, there's some kernel of good.
- Put yourself in situations where good things are likely to happen to you. It's easier to stay optimistic if you set yourself up for success. Cheating on a partner, or stealing a bike — while temporarily thrilling — rarely end well for any party involved. Ask yourself before you act: Am I setting myself up for success or for failure?
- Think of your current situation (however hard it may be) and then think of how much harder some other people have it. Just be happy that you are not in that worse situation. Learn to enjoy your life!
2- Follow your gut.
In one study, two groups of people were asked to pick a poster to take
home. One group was asked to analyze their decision, weighing pros and
cons, and the other group was told to listen to their gut. Two weeks
later, the group that followed their gut was happier with their posters
than the group that analyzed their decisions.
Now, some of our decisions are more crucial than picking out posters,
but by the time you're poring over your choice, the options you're
weighing are probably very similar, and the difference will only temporarily affect your happiness.
- Next time you have a decision to make, and you're down to two or three options, just pick the one that feels right, and go with it. Never regret the decisions you make, though. Just live by the 3 C's of life: choices, chances, and changes. You need to make a choice to take a chance, or your life will never change.
3- Make enough money to meet basic needs: food, shelter,
and clothing. In the US, that magic number is $40,000 a year. Any money
beyond that will not necessarily make you happier. Remember the lottery
winners mentioned earlier? Oodles of money didn't make them happier.
Once you make enough to support basic needs, your happiness is not
significantly affected by how much money you make, but by your level of
optimism.
- Your comfort may increase with your salary, but comfort isn't what makes people happy. It makes people bored. That's why it's important to push beyond your comfort zone to fuel personal growth.
4- Treat your body like it deserves to be happy. It may
sound cheesy to say, but your brain isn't the only organ in your body
that deserves to be happy. Researchers have found that exercise, healthy
diets, and regular sleep are key factors in growing more happy and
staying that way.
- People who are physically active have higher incidences of enthusiasm and excitement. Scientists hypothesize that excise causes the brain to release chemicals called endorphins that elevate our mood.
- Eat right. Eating healthy foods — fruits and vegetables, lean meats and proteins, whole grains, nuts, and seeds — gives your body and brain the energy it needs to be healthy. Some scientists speculate that unhealthy diets, especially those rich in processed carbohydrates, sugars, and industrial vegetable fats, is responsible for brain shrinkage and certain brain diseases like depression and dementia.
- Get enough sleep. Study after study confirms it: the more sleep you get, the happier you tend to be.Getting just a single extra hour of sleep per night makes the average person happier than making $60,000 more in annual income, astoundingly enough.So if you're middle-aged, shoot to get at least eight hours of sleep per night; the young and elderly should shoot for 9 to 11 hours of sleep per night.
5- Stay close to friends and family: Or move to where
they are, so you can see them more. We live in a mobile society, where
people follow jobs around the country and sometimes around the world. We
do this because we think salary increases make us happier, but in fact
our relationships with friends and family have a far greater impact on
happiness. So next time you think about relocating, consider that you'd
need a salary increase of over $100,000 USD to compensate for the loss
of happiness you'd have from moving away from friends and family.
- If relationships with family and friends are unhealthy or nonexistent, and you are bent on moving, choose a location where you'll make about the same amount of money as everyone else; according to research, people feel more financially secure (and happier) when on similar financial footing as the people around them, regardless of what that footing is
6- Be compassionate. Compassion is all about doing
something kind for someone in need, or someone less privileged than
yourself. A brain-imaging study (where scientists peek into people's
brains while they act or think) revealed that people gain as much
happiness from watching others give to charity as they do receiving
money themselves!
- Think of easy, quick, and effective ways that you can make your community a better place by being compassionate:
- Tutor, volunteer, or get involved in a church group. Countless children
are looking for someone to teach them and act as a role model.
- Make a microloan. A microloan is when you give someone (usually in the
developing world) a very small sum of money for an economic project of
their own. Many microloans have 95%+ repayment rates.
- Give a person in need food, clothing or shelter. It's so basic we often forget to think about it, yet so easy to do.
7- Have deep, meaningful conversations.
A study by a psychologist at the University of Arizona has shown that
spending less time participating in small talk and more time in deep,
meaningful conversations can increase happiness. So next time you're beating around the bush with a friend, instead cut right to the chase. You'll be happier for it.
8- Find happiness in the job you have now: Many people
expect the right job or career to dramatically change their level of
happiness. But research makes it clear that your levels of optimism and
quality of relationships eclipse the satisfaction gained from your job.
- If you have a positive outlook, you will make the best of any job; and if you have good relationships, you won't depend on your job for a sense of meaning. You'll find meaning in interactions with the people you care about. You'll use your job as a crutch instead of relying on it for meaning.
- This is not to say you shouldn't aspire to get a job that will make you happier; many people find that being on the right career path is a key determination in their overall happiness. It just means you should understand that the capacity of your job to make you happy is quite small when compared to your outlook and your relationships.
9- Smile: Science suggests that when you smile, whether you're happy or not, your mood is elevated.
So smile all the time if you can! Smiling is like a feedback loop:
smiling reinforces happiness, just as happiness causes smiling. People
who smile during painful procedures reported less pain than those who
kept their facial features neutral.
10- Forgive:
In a study of college students, an attitude of forgiveness contributed
to better cardiovascular health. You could say forgiveness literally
heals the heart. While it is unknown how forgiveness directly affects
your heart, the study suggests that it may lower the perception of
stress.
11- Make friends. In a 2010 study published by Harvard researchers in American Sociological Review,
people who went to church regularly reported greater life satisfaction
than those who didn't. The critical factor was the quality of
friendships made in church. Church-goers who lacked close friends there
were no happier than people who never went to church. When researchers
compared people who had the same number of close friends, those who had
close friends from church were more satisfied with their lives
- The difference is the forming of friendships based on mutual interests and beliefs. So if church is not your thing, consider finding something else you're deeply passionate about, making friends with those who share similar interests.
- When you interact with people who share your interests, you feel happier due to sensations of reward and well-being. This is because during such interactions, endorphin and dopamine — neurotransmitters responsible for feelings of happiness and relaxation — are released into the body. In other words, your body is designed to feel happier when engaged in social interactions.
Video
This video will show you what researchers have found can make you happier. Give it a try!
Tips
- When you're purposely trying to be happy or cheerful, but just can't
seem to achieve it at the moment, do something crazy. Stupid, crazy,
weird actions seem pointless, but could actually lift your mood -- just
because you're glad you did it. Most fundamentally, recognize that
happiness is a state of mind, not something to be defined objectively.
You can change your state of mind in many ways including these
suggestions:
- Turn your favorite music up loud and do a dance to it. Talk to yourself in the mirror.
- Try a new food.
- Rearrange your room in a weird way.
- Write a funny or inspiring quote on your mirror/wall/locker.
- Scream as loud as you can (warn your family first!) and bounce up and down; jump all around.
- If it's a hot day, get your swimsuit on, go outside and turn the hose on yourself.
- Keep in close touch with relatives and a small circle of friends. Cultivate love and support.
- Just because something seems to make others happy doesn't mean it really does. People may pretend they're happy, especially when they've invested so much into the things that are supposed to make them happy; it's hard to admit that you've been placing all your eggs in the wrong basket.
- Don't be afraid to admit when you're down and need a lift. Conversely, if a person is a negative influence who drags you down, don't be afraid to remove such a person from your life.
- Always be happy and make others happy.
- Always assume that what is done is done. Don't feel regret due to past mistakes. Instead, learn from them and move on.
- Dance or sing. If you're worried take a deep breath and focus on the positives.
Warnings
- Happy people are not happy all the time. Everyone has times when they feel sad, frustrated, guilty, angry, and so on. Happy people are just more resilient and better at maintaining a state of ubiquitous happiness. We may all feel negative at moments in our lives, but try to bounce back and live in the moment, and be content with everything you do.
- If you are constantly unhappy or depressed, seek professional help.
- Happy people are not happy all the time. Everyone has times when they feel sad, frustrated, guilty, angry, and so on. Happy people are just more resilient and better at maintaining a state of ubiquitous happiness. We may all feel negative at moments in our lives, but try to bounce back and live in the moment, and be content with everything you do.
- If you are constantly unhappy or depressed, seek professional help.
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